Helping Your Child After Sexual Abuse in Grand Rapids, Michigan

As a parent or caregiver in Grand Rapids, you play a critical role in helping your child heal after sexual abuse. Your belief, protection, and ongoing support can make a powerful difference in their recovery.

This guide offers practical ways to support your child, along with local Grand Rapids and Michigan resources that can help your family.

How to Support Your Child After Sexual Abuse

Believe Your Child

The most important message for your child to hear is:

  • The abuse was not their fault.
  • You believe them.
  • You will do your best to keep them safe.

Children in Grand Rapids, like everywhere, may feel scared, ashamed, or worried they will not be believed. Calmly saying, “I believe you, and this is not your fault,” can help reduce their fear and shame.

Reassure and Support Your Child

Tell Them It’s Not Their Fault

Be clear and simple in your language:

  • “You did nothing wrong.”
  • “The person who hurt you is responsible, not you.”
  • “I’m glad you told me.”

Avoid asking “why” questions that might sound like blame, such as “Why didn’t you tell me sooner?” Instead, focus on how brave they were to tell you now.

Let Them Know You Love Them

Children who have experienced sexual abuse often worry that people will see them differently. Make sure they know:

  • You love them the same as before.
  • You are proud of them for speaking up.
  • You are there to listen when they’re ready.

Create quiet, private time with your child—this might be at home after school, during a walk along the Grand River, or after a drive back from school or activities. Let them set the pace for talking.

Communicate Openly and Calmly

Be Open and Clear

Encourage your child to share their feelings:

  • “It’s okay to feel angry, sad, scared, or confused.”
  • “You can ask me any questions, even if they’re hard.”

Try to stay as calm as you can. Your child may become confused or frightened if they see you very angry or upset, even if your anger is directed at the person who hurt them or the situation.

Learn About the Effects of Sexual Abuse

Understanding common reactions can help you support your child. Children may:

  • Have trouble sleeping, nightmares, or bedwetting
  • Become more clingy or withdrawn
  • Have changes in school performance (for example, at Grand Rapids Public Schools or surrounding districts)
  • Show mood changes, irritability, or outbursts
  • Avoid certain people, places, or activities

Local healthcare providers in Grand Rapids—such as Spectrum Health, Trinity Health Grand Rapids, Metro Health, and Mercy Health—have pediatric and behavioral health professionals who can help evaluate these changes and provide treatment.

What to Say and What to Avoid

Helpful Things to Do and Say

  • Do say: “I believe you.”
  • Do say: “This is not your fault.”
  • Do say: “You did the right thing by telling me.”
  • Do say: “I will do everything I can to keep you safe.”
  • Do give them time to talk at their own pace.
  • Do listen more than you speak.
  • Do validate their feelings: “It makes sense you feel that way.”

Things to Avoid

Try not to:

  • Blame your child for what happened.
  • Question their honesty or suggest they are exaggerating.
  • Say you wish they hadn’t told you or imply it would be easier not to know.
  • Tell them to forget it ever happened or “move on” quickly.
  • Tell them not to talk about it to others.
  • Get visibly angry or overwhelmed when they talk about the abuse, in a way that makes them feel they need to protect you.

Even well‑intentioned comments can make a child feel guilty or responsible. Focus on safety, support, and belief.

Taking Care of Yourself So You Can Help Your Child

Supporting a child after sexual abuse is emotionally demanding. Parents and caregivers in Grand Rapids often juggle work, family responsibilities, and seasonal stress (such as long winters and limited daylight), which can make coping even harder.

You may feel:

  • Shock, anger, or rage
  • Guilt or self‑blame (“How did I not know?”)
  • Fear for your child’s future
  • Confusion about what to do next

Taking care of your own mental and physical health is not selfish—it helps you stay strong for your child.

Ways to Care for Yourself

  • Talk to a professional counselor or therapist.
    • Many Grand Rapids providers offer trauma‑informed counseling for parents and children.
    • Spectrum Health, Trinity Health Grand Rapids, Metro Health, and Mercy Health all have behavioral health services.
  • Reach out to trusted people.
    • Talk with a close friend, family member, faith leader, or support group.
  • Connect with other parents who have gone through similar experiences, if available through local support groups or online communities.
  • Look after your physical health.
    • Try to maintain regular sleep, nutrition, and physical activity.
    • In winter, when Michigan’s cold weather and shorter days can affect mood, consider indoor activities, light exposure, and talking with your doctor about seasonal depression if needed.
  • Schedule some “time out” for yourself.
    • Even short breaks—such as a walk in a Grand Rapids park, time at the library, or a quiet coffee—can help you reset.

Helping Your Child Adjust and Heal

Every child responds differently to sexual abuse. Some children in Grand Rapids may seem to cope well at first and struggle later; others may show changes right away.

Accept Changes in Behavior

Your child may:

  • Act younger than their age
  • Become more clingy or fearful
  • Have trouble concentrating at school
  • Avoid certain people or places
  • Show changes in appetite or sleep

These reactions are common. Let your child know:

  • “It’s okay if you feel or act differently right now.”
  • “We will get through this together.”

Spend Quality Time Together

Make time for:

  • One‑on‑one activities your child enjoys
  • Quiet routines: reading together, watching a show, drawing, or playing games
  • Outdoor time when possible (for example, playing at a local park when weather allows, or indoor activity centers during winter)

Regular, predictable routines can help your child feel safer, especially during Michigan’s long winter months when outdoor play may be limited and stress can feel higher.

Talking With Your Child About Sexual Abuse

Keep Conversations Age‑Appropriate

  • Use simple, clear words.
  • Answer questions honestly but without unnecessary detail.
  • Let your child guide how much they want to know.

Encourage Ongoing Communication

Remind your child:

  • They can talk to you anytime, even if it’s weeks or months later.
  • They won’t get in trouble for talking about what happened.
  • It’s okay if they don’t want to talk sometimes.

You might say:

  • “You can always tell me anything, even if you think I won’t like it or it’s hard to say.”
  • “If you don’t want to talk right now, that’s okay. I’m here when you’re ready.”

Local Resources in Grand Rapids, Michigan

If your child has experienced sexual abuse, you do not have to handle this alone. There are local and national resources that can help with crisis support, medical care, counseling, and legal guidance.

Emergency and Immediate Safety

  • Call 911 if your child is in immediate danger or needs urgent medical attention.
  • Local Hospitals & Emergency Departments:
    • Spectrum Health (Corewell Health) emergency departments in Grand Rapids
    • Trinity Health Grand Rapids
    • Metro Health – University of Michigan Health
    • Mercy Health locations in the region

These hospitals can connect you with specialized services for child abuse and sexual assault, including medical exams and referrals to counseling.

Child Protection and Local Public Health

  • Child Protective Services (CPS) – Michigan

    • Statewide Child Abuse & Neglect Reporting: 855‑444‑3911 (24/7)
    • If you suspect a child is being abused or is at risk, you can make a confidential report.

  • Kent County Health Department (KCHD)

    • Provides public health services, referrals to mental health and counseling, and information on local support programs.
    • Website: search “Kent County Health Department Grand Rapids MI”

  • Grand Rapids Public Health / City resources

    • Check the City of Grand Rapids and Kent County websites for local mental health, victim support, and family assistance programs.

Sexual Assault and Domestic Violence Support

  • National Sexual Assault Hotline – RAINN

    • Phone: 800‑656‑HOPE (4673) (24/7)
    • Online chat: rainn.org

  • National Domestic Violence Hotline

    • Phone: 800‑799‑SAFE (7233) (24/7)
    • TTY: 800‑787‑3224
    • Chat: thehotline.org

  • Local advocacy and counseling services

    • Many West Michigan and Grand Rapids‑area agencies provide:
      • Crisis counseling
      • Legal advocacy
      • Support groups for survivors and families
    • Search for “Grand Rapids sexual assault services” or “Kent County victim advocacy” or ask your child’s healthcare provider or school counselor for specific referrals.

Mental Health and Counseling in Grand Rapids

  • Hospital‑based behavioral health services

    • Spectrum Health, Trinity Health Grand Rapids, Metro Health, and Mercy Health all offer mental health services, including child and adolescent therapy.

  • Community mental health

    • Network180 (Kent County Community Mental Health Authority) provides mental health and substance use services for residents who qualify.
    • Search “Network180 Grand Rapids” for contact details and intake information.

  • School‑based support

    • Many Grand Rapids schools have counselors or social workers who can:
      • Support your child at school
      • Help arrange accommodations
      • Connect your family with local resources

Moving Forward: Healing Is Possible

Children who experience sexual abuse can heal and thrive with the right support. In Grand Rapids, you have access to strong healthcare systems, local mental health resources, and community organizations that understand trauma and recovery.

By:

  • Believing your child
  • Reassuring them it was not their fault
  • Staying calm and open to conversation
  • Seeking professional help when needed
  • Taking care of your own well‑being

you are giving your child a safer, more stable foundation for healing.

If you are unsure where to start, contact:

  • Your child’s primary care provider at a Grand Rapids clinic or hospital
  • The National Sexual Assault Hotline (800‑656‑HOPE)
  • Michigan CPS (855‑444‑3911) for concerns about ongoing safety

Reaching out for help is a strong and protective step for both you and your child.